Stuck Between the Past & the Future

Jana’s Sketchbook No. 6

I was at lunch recently with a friend and somehow we got on the subject of twin whirlpools. I had never heard of them. She mentioned that people kayaking experience them in rivers, and that the only way out of them is not the logical way out. One would think to paddle forward or across, but as the two spirals spin right next to each other the kayak is merely dragged back into the washing machine.

My friend told me that to get out you have to swim down deeper until you no longer feel pulled by the swirling currents. Once free, and still down deep, you can swim in any direction before rising once again to the surface. I am certain that I did not get the entire explanation right, because the whole time she was speaking I was seeing the story’s analogy as it related to my life.

I have been in the center of twin whirlpools for quite some time now. Lodged firmly between my past and my future. The only way out before getting spun once again into the fearful mire of either side is to find the center, and dive deep down toward what feels like certain death.

As my friend’s voice waxed on I felt like I was drowning, but when she began to speak of how to survive I saw God in the center of it all. I saw Him waiting for me in the deep, beyond the darkness and the spinning fear of life past and life forward. I saw that going deeper with God, while staying centered is the only way I will not die.

Just a thought…